Maiveeta wrote:I suspect in most instances, we are trying to be or to become something we aren't.
I really disagreed with this when you first postulated it in chat. I now tend to agree with you.Both are sought only after making the judgment that something is wrong with the self and something needs to be done to correct it.
We are taught from early childhood that we are bad. "dont be a bad boy/girl" or you are such a bad boy/girl you are grounded, cant have dinner... whatever, thereby starting the idea that we are somehow bad. Then we go to school, get grades to let us know just exactly how good/bad we are...none of those things are true. So we carry around this manufactured structure of what is good/bad. We are what we are...thats good stuff right there, never thought of it that way before.
Kim has a perspective on this that I've appreciated, and this morning, she amplified it. The process you describe she likens to acquiring a backpack full of rocks which we spend the rest of our lives dealing with as we trudge up the hill. Most if not all of the rocks are negatives about ourselves, leading often to self-loathing. The job remains to unload the backpack, equivalent to discovery of true self...not an easy job, and certainly the point of recapitulation.
Her addendum this morning concerned Downs Syndrome folk, who seem not to be burdened with backpacks full of rocks. They seem to love themselves and to love others with a sort of abandon. Kim wondered if perhaps they were not the truly advanced among us.