by Red Heart on Tue May 25, 2010 7:09 am
what a week!
If you haven't experienced The Wei Chi system of Natural Healing I suggest that you find a practitioner and do it. Wow! Powerful stuff that...So Sunday I went and met with the people with whom I will be working...what a lovely bunch of people, I had forgotten that there are folks out there like that...anyway I digress. So after this session of Wei Chi I have homework, and what better place to work it out but here...confronting the Storyteller head on. So to begin. My homework is "to claim my fabulousness!" Finding ways to reclaim my fabulousness everyday...This being among other things my journal of "How I was Fabulous today". I will start with yesterday as today is new...
Yesterday I discovered (this will be a duh moment for some) I have become angry and working my way toward bitter at an alarming pace. I do not like who I am becoming. Ok, well with that said I really did not realize it till yesterday. Odd. So I told my husband and he looked at me askance and said ok, well now what? Good question. My first response was to quit, to separate myself from the people who had "done me wrong"...to which my sweetie replied.."really? so then you can find yourself in the same situation somewhere else?" Oh dear. That means that I am going to have to DO something? SHit! Sometimes it sucks to live with a person like that...so anyway, it occured to me that this is an amazing opportunity to resolve some old stuff before I move on to something else. But How? I dont have a guru to tell me (ok I do but only in my head) so I have come up with a plan...to release it. <gasp> is that possible? Can I just let it go to the wind? Dont I have to pick at it and deconstruct it and resolve it? Wellllll...I have picked at it, till Im just about bitchy with self righteous anger, and hurt which is overflowing into many parts of my life outside of the situation...ok well thats not working. Deconstruct it, I often wake up deconstructing it and ruminating it and and and and and...thats not helpful. What was my part in it? I asked some questions, I was a little strident, I never confronted the situation head on, and neither did anyone else. I let it fester. Ok well cool. What was their part in it? Betrayal, insecurity, backbiting, and rigidity, and an unwillingness to talk about it. Ok well then. Alot of rigid behaviors. What to do? SEE it for what it is. Do not personalize it. There is enough crap to go around...there is enough strength to end it. How to end it? Release it. Dump it here in cyberspace where it cant hurt anyone, and maybe help someone. I feel done with it, for today. Amazing how just examining something objectively can be so cathartic. I cannot believe how much better I feel right now...peaceful really wow...just let it go and work from that space. Of course I havent encountered any of the people involved in this situation yet, I will let you know how that goes. :Unedited free type:
Galileo Galilei: "I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."